Just how fucking stupid do you think I am? You think I'd trust you to do something like that? For all I know this is some fucking trick you're planning with the Devil.
Do you honestly believe I would do that to you? After everything--
I am not cruel, Dean. I want to make it right, and I... I really do need you. I need you to trust me when I say it wasn't done without reason. It's changed slightly, but it's still for you. [ It always has been. ]
[ dean barks a vicious laugh at the text despite cas not being able to hear it. ]
Maybe it's because of everything that you did it. Was it some sort of revenge?
Quit the bullshit. If it had been for me, you would have told me right away. You would have killed him. You wouldn't have spat shit about finding a new place, or trusting each other.
[ Which just... makes him angry through the haze of anxiety medication he's taken, and suddenly, he's more than glad they're not face-to-face right now. ]
Because I wanted those things with you makes them wrong?
I tried once before, and I failed. What of that? Killing him then would have gotten us nowhere since no one stays dead. It's never going to stop if we continue doing it the same way we always have. That is the truth you can't seem to grasp.
How would it have been worth it? He would still be here. You would have tried killing him again, only to reach the same conclusion.
You're not the only one allowed to make mistakes. I'm not... infallible. Of anyone here, you know that best. At least I'm trying to amend what I've done.
You're not the only one he ruined, and I... There's only so much I can do before it gets out of hand. I didn't spare him out of mercy or pity. Wouldn't you want him to suffer as we have?
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no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 05:47 am (UTC)You think I'd trust you to do something like that?
For all I know this is some fucking trick you're planning with the Devil.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 05:58 am (UTC)I am not cruel, Dean. I want to make it right, and I... I really do need you. I need you to trust me when I say it wasn't done without reason. It's changed slightly, but it's still for you. [ It always has been. ]
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:03 am (UTC)Maybe it's because of everything that you did it. Was it some sort of revenge?
Quit the bullshit.
If it had been for me, you would have told me right away. You would have killed him.
You wouldn't have spat shit about finding a new place, or trusting each other.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:14 am (UTC)Because I wanted those things with you makes them wrong?
I tried once before, and I failed. What of that? Killing him then would have gotten us nowhere since no one stays dead. It's never going to stop if we continue doing it the same way we always have. That is the truth you can't seem to grasp.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:18 am (UTC)We were in another dimension, it might have not been the same.
You stole the chance to test that from me.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:21 am (UTC)[ Because that was another dimension too. He'd still come back. ]
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:24 am (UTC)I made a mistake.
Killing Lucifer and having him come back would have been worth the attempt.
But you were too fucking much of a coward, weren't you?
I can't believe I ever trusted you to stand by my side.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:35 am (UTC)You're not the only one allowed to make mistakes. I'm not... infallible. Of anyone here, you know that best. At least I'm trying to amend what I've done.
[ Even if it hurts to see him saying that. ]
no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:47 am (UTC)Save it, Cas. I don't care.
You mean nothing to me.
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Date: 2014-03-12 05:21 pm (UTC)[ Because he has nothing else to say to that, doesn't really know where to begin. He wishes he could take it back, but if anything, he's determined. ]
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Date: 2014-03-12 05:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-03-12 06:04 pm (UTC)You do something stupid, don't expect me to come running.
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Date: 2014-03-13 04:21 am (UTC)[ Maybe he's mocking him a little now. Maybe he's tired of the accusations. Either way, he's done with this back and forth of theirs. ]
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Date: 2014-03-13 04:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-03-13 04:52 am (UTC)The monster that took everything from me.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-13 04:57 am (UTC)You're not the only one he ruined, and I... There's only so much I can do before it gets out of hand. I didn't spare him out of mercy or pity. Wouldn't you want him to suffer as we have?
no subject
Date: 2014-03-13 05:01 am (UTC)If you had wanted that you would have contacted me when you found him.
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Date: 2014-03-13 05:03 am (UTC)(no subject)
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