Castiel should have known better. He should have told him when they were locked in that refrigerator, when the memory was fresh. He desperately hopes Dean will understand when he says it, when he explains, but given the hard tension that's filtering between them, he doesn't think it's going to go in that particular direction. Yet, should have is far different than didn't, and he sits on it, on those words as he goes impossibly still. Perhaps he could brush it off, but his body has other plans, moving back in so that he really is pressing the other man into the wall with his weight. He uncurls his fingers to cup Dean's face with both hands, holding him still and steady despite the tremor in his arms.
For those few seconds, he's close enough to kiss him. ]
Lucifer.
[ It's mostly a slur, mumbled right against Dean's ear, and then, not thinking, he presses his lips to his cheek in some parting gesture that begs forgiveness. Castiel hovers for a second, breath caught, but he's pushing himself back again before he can offer more--if it's current or a general feeling of failure. He doesn't tell Dean he knows about the torture, he doesn't tell him anything else. Instead, limbs a bit heavy, he tries to run away. ]
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Castiel should have known better. He should have told him when they were locked in that refrigerator, when the memory was fresh. He desperately hopes Dean will understand when he says it, when he explains, but given the hard tension that's filtering between them, he doesn't think it's going to go in that particular direction. Yet, should have is far different than didn't, and he sits on it, on those words as he goes impossibly still. Perhaps he could brush it off, but his body has other plans, moving back in so that he really is pressing the other man into the wall with his weight. He uncurls his fingers to cup Dean's face with both hands, holding him still and steady despite the tremor in his arms.
For those few seconds, he's close enough to kiss him. ]
Lucifer.
[ It's mostly a slur, mumbled right against Dean's ear, and then, not thinking, he presses his lips to his cheek in some parting gesture that begs forgiveness. Castiel hovers for a second, breath caught, but he's pushing himself back again before he can offer more--if it's current or a general feeling of failure. He doesn't tell Dean he knows about the torture, he doesn't tell him anything else. Instead, limbs a bit heavy, he tries to run away. ]